As my mother continues to decline, something has become very apparent to me. Death, wills, and money are topics that are almost taboo to discuss.
It is so important to have a will, even a simple one, so that if something were to happen, the people who you leave behind have clear instruction on what it is you have and want. When you don’t have a will, instead of having time to grieve, they are left with having to make decision after decision. On top of that, if it is unclear as to what your assets are and how they are to be divided your loved ones are left to scramble to try to figure it all out.
My parents have been pretty open and clear to my sister and I about what they want should something happen to them. We know where their finances stand and how they want things divided up. We know what their wishes are as far as burial/cremation. Those are things we don’t have to worry about.
But, now that my mother is failing my father is finding himself in a position of stress and uncertainty. He doesn’t have the best heart and stresses that should something happen to him, my mom would not be properly taken care of. She’s gotten to the point where she can’t be left alone at all and needs help with basic things such as getting dressed and eating.
It’s for situations like this where if you have a plan, a backup plan, and a worst-case scenario plan comes into play.
The last thing I want is for my dad to be stressed. He needs to know and trust that my sister and I will do whatever we need to do to make sure the love of his life is well taken care of in his absence.
Communication is key when it comes to planning for the what-ifs. My sister and I talk weekly about where things stand and what needs to happen in the next couple of months. We have a plan in place in case something were to happen to my dad, and there’s a plan for if nothing does happen. Not only that, but my mom’s siblings are also aware of what the plans are and what we may need assistance with.
We have a plan and are at peace with what will need to be done. That is huge. I wish we could share that peace with my dad. I don’t think there’s anything we can say though that will ease his worry and stress. He loves her with every fiber of his being and if…