I’ll Hold Your Memories

A letter to my mother, suffering from Alzheimer’s

Photo by Jeremy Wong on Unsplash

Hey, Mama,

I see you struggling, trying to remember who I am and how you know me. I can’t even imagine how scary and frustrating that is for you. I’m here though so now you can relax because I’ll hold those memories for you.

I remember when I was in elementary school. I would come home and run into the house. You’d always be sitting on the living room step where you’d sit with me and talk about our day. No matter what had happened, those moments gave me a chance to let it all out and breathe.

I remember sitting next to you each week in church. You would sit and hold my hand to keep me from fidgeting. Your fingers were so smooth I would sit and rub them and wonder how you made them so soft. I remember looking up at you, and you smiling down at me. Come to find out decades later, the tips of your fingers were so smooth it was impossible to fingerprint you.

I remember the middle school years and the countless times you would wrap your arms around me as I sobbed out my latest heartbreak. You never asked too many questions, as though you already knew the answers. As a parent now, I know how difficult that must have been for you emotionally. you never judged, you never said, “I told you so.” The comfort I felt in your arms…